Common Sense Died
AN OBITUARY PRINTED IN THE LONDON TIMES
An Obituary Printed In the London Times Interesting and sadly true
"Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, "Common Sense",
who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he
was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red
tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons
as:
Knowing when to come in out of the rain; why the early bird gets the
worm; Life isn't always fair; and maybe it was my fault.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend
more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children,
are in charge).
His health began to deteriorate rapidly when
well-intentioned but
overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a
6-year-old boy
charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate;
teens suspended
from school for using mouth wash after lunch; and a
teacher fired for
reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his
condition. Common
Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for
doing the job that
they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their
unruly children.
It declined even further when schools were required to
get parental
consent
to administer sun lotion or an Aspirin to a student; but
could not
inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted
to have an abortion.
Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches
became businesses;
and criminals received better treatment than their
victims. Common
Sense took a
beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar
in your own
home and the burglar could sue you for assault. Common
Sense finally
gave up the
will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a
steaming cup of
coffee
was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was
promptly awarded a
huge settlement. Common Sense was preceded in death, by
his parents,
Truth and Trust. His wife, Discretion, his daughter,
Responsibility, his son, Reason.
He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights;
I Want It Now;
Someone Else Is To Blame; I'm A Victim. Not many
attended his funeral
because so few realized he was gone. If you still
remember him, pass
this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.